12 Yearold Boy
Your child is closer to becoming a teenager every day during the tween years. All the changes that come with the teen years are slow and gradual, so you have plenty of time to prepare.
Twelve-year-olds can have moments when they act like their child and suddenly become adults. Learn how to prepare for the cognitive, emotional, and physical development that occurs at this age.
Twelve-Year-Old Language and Cognitive Milestones
Although a 12-year-old’s brain may not have stopped growing in size yet, it is still developing. The development of abstract thinking, problem-solving, logic, and reasoning is all improving, says Chris Cardona Correa, MD, an adolescent medical fellow at the University of Minnesota. The ability to think from other perspectives and plan long-term is a sign of a young teen.
However, the prefrontal cortex is still maturing and is responsible for impulse control and organizational skills. Don’t be surprised that your 12-year-old engages in potentially impulsive behaviours.
Language and Cognitive Checklist
- Starts a shift from concrete to abstract thinking
- Understands and applies logic in solving problems and situations
- Becoming aware of the concepts of justice and equality
- Understanding cause-and-effect sequences are essential.
12-Year-Old Physical Growth
The middle year is when girls begin puberty. It is also the age at which boys typically begin puberty.
Dr Cardona Correa explains that early adolescence can be a time of many physical and mental changes. “At 12 years old, many adolescents begin to experience signs of puberty: new smells, hair growing in new places and acne.
Physical Milestones Checklist
- Signs of puberty include menstruation in boys and girls and changes in how muscles develop in boys.
- Sportsmanship becomes more common
- A growth spurt occurs
Twelve-Year-Old Social and Emotional Milestones
Teenagers’ emotions are not to be taken lightly. You will likely experience a lot of it over the next year. Twelve-year-olds are devoted to their parents but don’t want anything to do with them. Friends have become more important than ever.
Dr Cardona Correa says that as early adolescents leave their families, they will become more dependent on peer support groups. Peer groups are often associated with strong, solitary friendships that sometimes seem intense. However, it is possible for your 12-year-old to be interested in making contact with someone else’s sex.
Emotional and social checklist
- Shows a rebellious streak
- Emotions can swing between happiness and sadness frequently
- Starts to question family values and develop morality
- Displays concern about being liked or accepted
- Fluctuating self-esteem
Additional Milestones for Your Twelve-Year-Old
Many 12-year-olds start to explore the morals of their peers. Do not be surprised if your 12-year-old declares they would like to live with their friend’s family or explore a different religion.
It’s a natural part of developing a child’s morality. Don’t worry if your child doesn’t share your beliefs. It’s part of their identity development.
How to help your 12-year-old learn and grow
It is normal to feel like your preteen is moving away from you. It’s normal to feel disconnected from your preteen during their transition into adolescence. However, showing interest in their hobbies, friendships, and opinions is important. “Be present,” advises Dr Trachtenberg. Invite friends to your home and allow them to express themselves without judgment or shame [and] support one another.”
It will be easier to have difficult conversations with your tween, like about their growing sexuality. Talking about sexuality with your child is not a time to ignore. Dr Cardona Correa says, “Talk about difficult topics and sometimes tough topics [frequently]”.
How to keep your 12-year-old safe
Safety is more than just physical safety at this age. Your 12-year-old should have all communication channels open. While your child is trying to establish their independence, it could lead to them being exposed and confronted with situations they aren’t ready for or know-how. This includes peer pressure, growing up, and all the other things that come with it. Let them know they can always talk with you.
“Communication is key,” says Dr Trachtenberg. Ask open-ended questions and listen. Don’t offer advice. Your tween needs to know that they can still rely on their parents for help, even as they establish independence. Discuss what your 12-year-old would like to do independently and make compromises when necessary.
